Can This Story Change your Life? Forgiving the Unforgivable May 2nd, 2017

Can This Story Change your Life?  Forgiving the Unforgivable

“Forgiveness doesn’t excuse their Behavior.  Forgiveness Prevents their Behavior from Destroying Your Heart” #Beyondordinary

Self-limiting beliefs change the way we live.  Some how our brains latch onto the negatives.  We nurture them, they grow, and before long, there’s a belief that becomes a part of us.  Sometimes we are not even aware that these leeches are clinging to our very being and robbing us of our joy and potential.

I saw a presentation presented by Imaculee.  She is the author of “Left to Tell”, a story of a Rwanda woman surviving the genocide in her country.  During her frightening ordeal of 90 days trapped in a 6ft bathroom with 6 other women, she lived in unmanageable fear and an unmanageable fight for survival.  Here is a brief description of her story.  Be aware that there are some graphic and disturbing images in this video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7Od6V6Z3ug

The essence is how struggle and suffering can change your life.  She learned English by reading the only book she had, and that was a Bible.  Even more amazing is that she forgave those who took so much from her.

Forgiving the unforgivable is not easy to do.  While holding on to the resentment empowers a justification, it also strips the energy needed to use your full potential.  Nelson Mandela says “Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.”  How often have we held on to resentment with a righteous attitude?  It may give some satisfaction of justification while the true suffering is simmering beneath our consciousness.

I’m reminded of the lines in the movie “The Shack” that wrestles with the message of “Where is God when there is such unimaginable suffering?  The answer?  It is stated that ‘incredible good can come from unspeakable tragedies.’  Forgiveness is given to all. 

What buddhism says about suffering is that it is the root of something we are attached to.  In other words, “attachment is the root of all suffering.”  Behind the pain there is something that we’re always holding on to.  It could be control, pleasures, or material possessions.  All that we’re attached to can be lost.  Loss creates suffering.  To overcome suffering, acceptance is essential.

Suffering is a part of living.  Dimitrios G. Oreopoulos MD. of Toronto, Canada says that suffering is our teacher that can provide unique possibilities for personal development.  Understanding the meaning rather than harboring the bitterness offers more possibilities.  While it is a challenge to forgive unforgivable acts, we need to be ready to stop identifying with the suffering. Too often we feel that forgiveness is for the other person.  Actually, forgiveness is for the self.  It is a way of saying I am ready to let go of the pain.  It is then, that we are able to move on.

If you are ready to overcome suffering’s grip and learn ways to accomplish your potential with counseling and to heighten your personal development, call me.  Traveling this journey alone can often be confusing and lonely.

"There is no greater battle in life than the battle between the part of you that wants to be healed and the parts of you that are comfortable and content remaining broken." ~Iyanla Vanzant

How do you forgive the unforgivable?

Carole Stokes-Brewer, PhD

Walk a New Path

Wood Bridge

Meditation

"Take the first step in faith. You don't have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step."

~ Martin Luther King, Jr.

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My Notes: Journeys To Inspiration

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This guided journal written by Dr. Stokes-Brwer will lead you through a personal journey to release the past and become clear on what you really want from life. It will help you remain in the present, mindful of your ambitions and how your actions support or interfere with your success.

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